I apologise readily for the self-indulgence of this post. But, as the point of this blog is to reflect on my own experiences and share in the little drops of wisdom I have encountered in my own life’s journey, I feel I need to air some of the frustrations and take stock of the world I am about to leap back in to…
As I write this, it is a cold end-of-November night in 2016 – a possibly dreary and yet somewhat exciting time in my life’s journey. Presently I am sitting in my room in Bexleyheath, Kent and contemplating “the next steps”.
It’s a strange thing getting older. I have found that I am somewhere along the way in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by somewhere else and not quite feeling like this is what it’s all about. Life. Ha! I currently wrangle with myself over the possibilities of what may actually lie ahead on this journey of life, and consider the prospects that may bring and how ready I am to set off into a new future.
After several years of feeling devoid of hope (burden of post-mortgage and past-life debt and dreams torn up in the storms of the world), I find myself about to step out in the world without such chains to hold me down. I have worked hard to rid myself of it all – and it is with real joy (and a heavy dose of hesitation) that I contemplate what I should now consider doing with my life. It’s a strange thing getting older and finding freedom. What to do with it?
I have been in a job for a couple of years that I have not enjoyed. In fact, my very modus operandi for taking on the role was to expedite the paying off of past dues. Now that is settled, I am able to ask myself a question I realise not many people are able to make: what is it that I want? If I stay in my current position, I do so because I choose to – not because of a need or force to. This opens a barrage of deeper questions: am I happy where I am? Am I happy in my job? What do I see the future holding for me? Where do I want to be in the next few years?
In setting up For Life’s Journey, I am determined to not only establish myself as celebrant of life in the literal sense, but I am also determined to find truth in myself and be as honest as I can be about my own personal journey. This makes me feel incredibly vulnerable, but it feels like a positive (if somewhat bold) step to make and I will share elements of myself that I am only just now discovering. These blog posts will be a personal exploration and revelation – but will also be a deeper and more tuned in effort to celebrate the wealth of life’s riches. Throughout, I resolve to open up to how I truly feel and share my path with you: my unseen friends and readers.
It’s Time to Let Go For Life’s Journey
It’s time to let go of the past. It’s going to be a rocky journey in which I will confront my own emotional barriers and find light at the end of the darkness (and depression) that I have encountered. Some things will be difficult to discuss, some will be genuinely uplifting and full of love. I look forward to it all, and dread each varying possibility that is about to occur.
For now, I shall leave it there. But suffice it to say: welcome! I look forward to you accompanying for life’s journey.